The First Barge lyrics

 

You see the smiles upon their faces

As the news spreads over town

If that rumourís right, you know tomorrow night

That first barge comes to town.

 

Everybody thinks their orderís on the first barge

But somebody must be wrong

Or else the first barge will have to be a mile wide

And forty-five miles long.

 

Itís got fresh eggs, milk, cheese and butter

Johnny Walkerís special old

Baseball spikes, motorbikes

And a brand new still,  Iím told

Itís got light plants, underpants

And apples from B.C.

Paper plates, hockey skates

And aluminum Christmas trees.

 

Itís got fresh greens, blue jeans

Pork and beans, Peak freans,

A roll of binder twine and silverware

Itís got long-johns, bon-bons and prefabricated stairs

And one hundred and fourteen identical D.P.W. rocking chairs.

 

Itís got baseball bats, hunterís hats

Hobbnail boots, business suits

And so much booze; if they wanted to

They could float the Queen Mary

Inside the Zoo.

Itís got Detroit cars, handle bars

And an engine for a plane

Picture books and coloring books

And toy electric trains,

 

Thereís no item thatís too small

Thereís no article too large

They talk as if the whole damned world

Was coming upon that barge.

 

You see the smiles upon their faces

As the word spreads over town

If that rumourís right, you know tomorrow night

That first barge comes to town

Thereís just one more thing that theyíre bringing friends

That makes the Public health nurse shiver

The crews bring up all the Social Diseases

That they pick up in Hay River .